You Might be a Redneck Pole Vaulter

[Tim McMichael]

If you thought you had found a great way to travel to out of state meets till the pilot explained that you could absolutely not, under any circumstances, strap poles onto a crop duster.

If your first international competition made you so homesick that you actually kissed the ground in the airport terminal in New York City.

If you have a hard time convincing people at international meets that you don't actually know characters from "Dallas" and "The Dukes of Hazzard."

[Barto]

[quote="Tim McMichael"]If you thought you had found a great way to travel to out of state meets till the pilot explained that you could absolutely not, under any circumstances, strap poles onto a crop duster.
quote]

Tim,

Man you got the wrong pilot! They fit right up against the fuselage perfectly. That used to be the only way I got them from Stillwater to Fayetteville.

[vaultmd]

You forgot you used a butt plug as a spitoon for your chew until after you threw it back into your bag.

[Tim McMichael]

If you thought you had found a great way to travel to out of state meets till the pilot explained that you could absolutely not, under any circumstances, strap poles onto a crop duster.
quote]

Tim,

Man you got the wrong pilot! They fit right up against the fuselage perfectly. That used to be the only way I got them from Stillwater to Fayetteville.

That really stinks. The guy I talked to said if I tried it I would not get to the track meet alive. I think he thought I was going to strap them to the wings. I have no idea who you are, Barto, but I am sure I know you. If you found a single engine plane that would fly poles to Fayetteville, I am seriously jealous.

[Tim McMichael]

If your hill work in the off-season involves checking for rattle snakes.

If one of the best things about pole vaulting when you were a kid was that you never had to open a gate or wade through a creek again.

If you have ever tried to move a pit with a tractor and a log chain.

If 35' of angle iron, two tire rims, some bailing wire and your neighbor's cutting torch mean a set of standards that you don't have to pay $1500.00 for.

If the primary color of your high school's standards is duct tape grey.

If a good poke with pole is the perfect solution to a baby pig stuck in a hole under the fence.

If three inches of freezing rain mean lacing on your longest spikes and pushing all your neighbor's cars out of their driveways.

If you have ever imagined that a tornado at exactly the right moment might mean a world record that would never be broken and a great way to die doing what you love.

[polevaulter08nw]

If your hill work in the off-season involves checking for rattle snakes.

If one of the best things about pole vaulting when you were a kid was that you never had to open a gate or wade through a creek again.

If you have ever tried to move a pit with a tractor and a log chain.

If 35' of angle iron, two tire rims, some bailing wire and your neighbor's cutting torch mean a set of standards that you don't have to pay $1500.00 for.

If the primary color of your high school's standards is duct tape grey.

If a good poke with pole is the perfect solution to a baby pig stuck in a hole under the fence.

If three inches of freezing rain mean lacing on your longest spikes and pushing all your neighbor's cars out of their driveways.

If you have ever imagined that a tornado at exactly the right moment might mean a world record that would never be broken and a great way to die doing what you love.

haha wow! mad props to these! do tell some of these stories if they are true and they seem real because they seem like they are that hard to come up with unless you actually did them! haha great stuff

[Tim McMichael]

If part of your preparation for the summit involves a lot of time at local Indian casinos and bingo barns.

[Tim McMichael]

If the main problem with your high bar is that the bark keeps tearing your calluses off.

If you refer to pole diameters in terms of shotgun gauges.

If getting your first pole involved a hike into the woods with an axe and a bow saw.

[primetime614]

If the height of the bar is dependant on how long the shovel is or how many bricks you stack in order to hold up the rusty old standard.

[Tim McMichael]

If you have ever tried to communcate with the officials at an international meet by drawing pictures in the dirt with a stick.

If you have ever no-heighted because you did not know that the alcohol content of beer in Poland is really, really high.

If eating crawdads and fried cow testicles prepared you for the experience of having to eat whole boiled squid in Taiwan.

[Tim McMichael]

If you have ever used a pole to get a dead squirrel out of a tree.

If you learned how to clear the middle of the bar by aiming for the window in the hay loft.

If you describe getting hit by a flying piece of broken pole in terms of getting kicked by a cow.

If you have ever tried to change the flex of a pole with a belt sander. (Don't do this!)

[souleman]

OK, this is a repeat because last time I put it in was in August.......It seems a little more appropriate now.

If during the 30 or so years that were "vaultless" you discovered that the 1550 Black Cat (that you still have cause you bought it in the first place cause your high school wouldn't buy one for you. At $54 it was too much money compared to a $40 Wonder Pole they said they would buy for you) made for an excellent Christmas light puter upper.
HOWEVER......THERE'S MORE!

Since you came back to vaulting, you've chopped the 1550 down to 13' 9" cause you thought you might "try to get on it again" but instead........

You put the "grab the lights adapter" on the Thermoflex cause it's longer.
(Where did all these old poles come from?)
Later...........Mike